Right on the heels of the genealogy, we move into Matthew’s telling of the birth of Christ. In the Gospel of Luke, we get a lot about Mary, the angel Gabriel’s words to her, the 
conception and birth of John the Baptist, and, of course, the most full telling of Jesus’ birth. But Joseph is largely absent. In fact, in the events leading up to the birth, his name is only mentioned once, nearly in passing (1:27).
But in Matthew, he takes center stage in the narrative, though he’s never quoted. And he’s in a tough spot: Mary is pregnant with a child from the Holy Spirit, but this story is not going to fly with the world around them. At best people will think she is pregnant by Joseph prior to their wedding, which is not good for either them. And at worst people will believe that Mary became pregnant through a man other than Joseph and that will lead to greater marginalization, particularly for Mary.
Joseph, however, can save himself. In this grossly sexist and oppressive culture he can claim he never had sex with her, making her an adulteress (because once you’re engaged, you’re pretty much committed in that culture), and then he can move on with his life. This is the option he chooses, however he decides to do it “quietly” so as to minimize the public shame Mary is certain to incur. But not so fast Joseph.
An angel appears to him and basically says, “no, Joseph. You’re in this too.” And he sticks with it. He’s in a tough spot. He is called to enter into this but to do essentially as a step-father. I feel for him. I really do. He’s kind of cast aside, made to go along with a plan in which he has little power, little voice, and an uncertain future.
There is a lot to this little story in Matthew 1 (Emmanual/”God is with us”, naming the child, Joseph’s faithfulness…), but as I read it anew there’s a part of me that says, “it’s about time”. It’s about time a man took the back seat in the narrative in the Bible. It’s happened before, but it’s rare. It’s a common theme when reading the birth stories of Jesus: “Poor Joseph. He’s so in the background… He doesn’t even say a word in the story… He gets little to no glory…” Yet we rarely if ever say that about any women in any stories in the Bible.
So let’s let Joseph sit in the back seat. Let’s let Mary take center stage and be the Holy Mother. Let’s let Joseph be put into the position of a servant, called to go along with it and relinquish some of his own reputation and wellbeing for the sake of Mary’s call. In this sense, let’s let Joseph be the “pastor’s wife”. Let’s not try to lift up Joseph and what a great guy he is to have his life altered because of his partner.
And, men, as culture continues to progress, at whatever pace, let’s practice taking on the spirit of Joseph by being okay with being in the background. let’s relinquish our privilege and submit to the leadership of the women around us whose ideas, thoughts, strategies, and power have been minimized and dismissed for too long. Let’s let go of the reins we so fiercely cling to. Because, well, it’s Mary’s time.
Poor, poor Joseph. Nah. He’ll be fine. And so will we.
Moving Through Matthew 